Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Episode 160 (Part 2): Never Leave Me


At the Jay house, Todd's daugher comes to the hard realization as to what "dog years" means - and begs something of the family pet she would never beg of her Dad.

As for Matt, he is now a regular at "MotherCluckers" and really wants either no agency or total agency over his gustatory experiences.

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Sunday, March 29, 2015

Episode 160 (Part 1): Your Testicles and You


Duck and cover your boys.
On this episode we learn the future of Dave's testicles, and it doesn't look good.

Todd decides to make a last trip to the Jelly Belly factory.

Matt decides to make art from Rubik's cubes, and the Dads want their damned bottomless onion rings.

Then the Dads turn the clock back to "Dramedy", Todd waxes nostalgic about dusty mouthfeel, and they all hated "Sex and the City."

Then, Dave's balls.

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Friday, March 27, 2015

Bonus Problems 138: Skim Coat My Butt Crack





Screw you, Charmin Bears.
Dave and Kelly shop at odd hours of the night, and random packages arrive at all hours of the day.

Dave can leave his house without being scene... could come in handy.

Ever seen a naked, masturbating, or pooping person in the city? These Dads have.

And Todd Lifehacks a business card.

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Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Episode 159 (Part 2): Can We Get to That Lube?

Looking a-okay, Mister Jay!
"Todd Gets a Physical" is one of our favorite updates ever - give a listen!

This week, Matt drinks beer in a grocery store and now wants to drink beer everywhere, like the cool dads (and alcoholics) do.

D.M. brings his twin toddlers to live theatre - what could possibly go wrong?

And Todd gets a physical. But how physical will it get?

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Sunday, March 22, 2015

Episode 159 (Part 1): Death Plus Twenty


Together, we're 375 years young!
Todd has plans for an empty jelly bean factory in Wisconsin. On his way there, he'll use his new iPhone holder that plugs into his useless CD slot.

Matt and Todd are texting monsters.

D.M. found Life Itself difficult to watch. This turns into D.M.'s Mike Tyson stories.

Giada De Laurentiis has big, beautiful cans. And huge Skeleton teeth.

ISIS are dicks.

Voicemail messages challenge the dads to beat a 95 year old man in a 200m run. Michael Rice challenges us all to vote for his podcast.
(podcastawards.com, and vote for OperaNow!)

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Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Episode 158 (Part 2): Sneeze Out of Your Butt


Todd tries to recall if we were as big of dicks in Jr. High s current Jr. High kids. (Spoiler: Yes.)  The Dads realize the world now has no outdoors, bikes are a thing of the past, and no one has to share porn.

D.M. is walking down the hall and he feels something fall.  Then, many tales of D.M. using the world as his toilet.

Matt is the biggest douche ever. And stop wiping down everything, assholes.

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Sunday, March 8, 2015

Episode 158 (Part 1): Down to F*ck


"Thanks, Sophia, but we're gonna stay the night.
The pheromones in this cage can only mean one thing:
everybody's down."
Matt's late, probably doing a d*ck stand with a jar of beef au jus. Todd and D.M. discuss a former porn star who makes YouTube dollars showing toys to kids.

D.M. has to eat an entire pizza to hide the evidence that he wanted two slices of pizza.

Todd is considers purchasing a bag to hold his groceries.

D.M. dips his tie in urine.

Weasels flying on woodpeckers.

Like the cast of Cocoon, The Golden Girls were younger than you think. And down to F*ck.

Finally, the dads measure the value of naked bodies over forty.


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